5 ways to stay “cool” when meeting your EX’s current girlfriend

I knew my Ex has a girlfriend and I felt a slight pang when I saw them on facebook, I thought “well that’s normal since we both had fun playing should we or shouldn’t we take the plunge”. I realized he was not my forever because we were never on the same page; fuck we were at different chapters he was still at chapter 7 and I was at chapter 34.

Despite the fact that we respect each other I wasn’t ready to see him but we had the same group of friends (side note: don’t date a friend) thus seeing him is inevitable. Last night I saw him with his girlfriend at my friend’s house even if both of us wanted to leave immediately. We both played it “cool” and I like to believe I played it “cool” better.

Smile and greet them.

First reaction is always the giveaway. Even if you think he had downgraded because the girl has humungous teeth and literally a big head or he has found a catch because you can’t help notice how flat her tummy is, how perky her boobs are and how smart she is because of her fancy medical school; just smile and greet them like you normally do.

Don’t sound like a bitter ex-girlfriend.

Yes, you could have drop the “one man trash is another man’s treasure” line but don’t— please don’t say it.

Do make small talks

Don’t ignore them everybody can feel the elephant in the room the best way to break it is talk to them. I know it hurts every time you see his arms wrapped around her tiny waist or the way she makes him laugh; shake those off and ask her name and what she does. Even if you already know based on your mad social media stalking skills that she has a pet cat and she dyed her hair pink in the summer of ‘09 or that she’s good at baking and school, she’s practically a hybrid of Martha Stewart and Marie Curie.

Don’t brag but give subtle hints that you’re seeing people.

The first thought I had when I saw them is I should brag about Guy Y so that my ex would know I’m back in the game and moved on but I didn’t, I just mentioned that I’m dating and taking things slow.

Find humor in the situation

You have two choices act like the situation is bothering you or laugh it off. My asshole friend told my ex’s girlfriend if he knows who I am instead of acting like a sourpuss and give a stink eye, I turned it around and mentioned I was the crazy ex and joked about how awkward the situation is. Everybody laughed and the tension was gone. Finding humor in situations like that is essential especially if you know that the setting right now stings just pretend you find it funny and eventually it will be something you’ll genuinely laugh about.

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